Lately I’ve been feeling like I’m always THE ONE on the short end of the stick so to speak. I often feel like my all isn’t always good enough. It could just be me, but its something I’ve felt for quite awhile.
I mean why is it that I always pick the guy that’s into another female or even into men, has a dozen kids, lack ambition. I’ve heard the saying you are what you attract. But I honestly don’t think I possess any of those characteristics. For instance, this guy *Thomas and I kicked it for about a year or so on and off. At first, he was really into me; while I wasn’t really checking for him. We were hot and heavy for a couple of months and then I broke the news. I told him I wasn’t looking for a relationship at that time. He looked as If I had just ripped his heard out and fed it to the dogs. I felt so bad, but I knew it was something I had to tell him. I guess honesty isn’t always the best policy. So after breaking the news he and I sort of went our separate ways. He called sometimes to check on me, and expressed his love for me. I felt bad because I couldn’t tell him those words, although I wanted to. It just wasn’t in my heart.
*Name Change
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